I am a mother of 4, with the youngest being severely disabled, and a grand mother of 3. Though I personally have never had an abortion I have had 2 miscarriages. The grief that I experienced with my miscarriages was very real and painful and still is. They were a part of me that never got to grow to their full potential outside of the womb.
The difference between a miscarriage and an abortion is a choice. One the body makes the decision, the other the mind. What we both share is the grief afterwards and the pain deep within and yes guilt. Though the miscarriages that I had had were beyond my control, I still found myself wondering if I did something wrong that caused them.
Recently a woman I didn’t even know crossed my path. The pain, guilt shame and despair she carries on a daily basis for choosing to have not one not two but three abortions was and is very real. She has tried to forget and bury what she has done and the pain that went with it but cannot. Every time she sees a child around the age of her aborted children she is reminded that she made the choice to end her child’s life. The reason someone chooses, and yes it is a choice, is not the issue. The issue is the emotions women are left to live with afterwards. It affects them for the rest of their lives.
Being a mother of a severely disabled daughter I see how much potential each life has even though the world does not see that in my daughter. Each and every life is so very precious and has worth and a purpose. Abortion cuts both the unborn child and the mother’s life and potential short. Neither is able to live out their true purpose of life which was intended for them. Their lives have forever been altered. The child never gets the chance to know what life had to offer them and what their purpose in life would have been. The mother’s purpose has been altered and changed with a lifetime of guilt and shame in a negative way for life, if it is not dealt with.
My heart grieves for the unborn that are aborted but also for the grieving women who feel they have no other choice but to abort the child they carry without really knowing the life-time consequences of their decision that lie ahead of them. The hardest thing for these women will be and is being able to forgive themselves for ending their child’s life. By ending abortion now we are saving the lives of both the unborn child and the mother’s.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
When Shame and Compassion Meet
When Shame and Compassion Meet
10-27-09
I have turned from my Fathers love, provisions and protection to go it on my own. Once again I have failed miserably; finding myself worse off than before.
I need to return to my Father, but what will He say? Will He receive me back after all I have done?
I could see He might receive me back if this was the first time but my second, third, fourth? How many times will I test His patience? Why have I been fighting against Him?
“Ah Father, I'm so sorry. I have been such a fool.”
Will He accept my plea? Will He turn away from me?
I have nothing left to lose, but to ask, as this shame is more than I can bear.
“Father I'm coming home. I pray You will receive me. I'm walking back Father to the place where I left You. I am scared You won't receive me. Have I gone too far this time?”
I'm on my knees now as the shame and guilt are weighing heavily upon me. I cannot take another step as I'm not deserving of His love.
Maybe if I reached out with an outstretched hand I could just touch His feet. I know I cannot look Him in the face as I have let him down again and again. I have disgraced Him. How can He ever look at me again?
I am face down in the dirt with my outstretched hand praying to just touch His feet, though I am so unworthy even to touch His sandals.
“Father forgive me. I am so sorry, will You forgive me? Can You?”
The sorrow is so great I feel as though my heart will burst from the pain.
“Wait... what is this that I am feeling? Father is that You? Is it really Your presence that I am feeling? Father, no, please do not ask me to look up at You. I am so not worthy. The shame is too great. Father, please can't I just lay prostrate at Your feet?”
“My child NO! Please do not fight me, but feel the love I have for you. Receive it like you never have before. Look, not only up at me, but rise! Your sins are forgiven. I hold no condemnation over you. I love you My child, the shame and guilt are more than you are to carry. Lay them down.”
“Hold fast to me and keep your eyes upon me, feel My love for you and sin no more.”
Welcome Home My child, you have been missed.
John 8:7b-12 (NKJV)
7 and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.” 8 And again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. 9 Then those who heard it, being convicted by their conscience,[b] went out one by one, beginning with the oldest even to the last. And Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. 10 When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her,[c] “Woman, where are those accusers of yours?[d] Has no one condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said to her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and[e] sin no more.” 12 Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”
Romans 8:1 (NKJV)
1 There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus,[a] who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.
10-27-09
I have turned from my Fathers love, provisions and protection to go it on my own. Once again I have failed miserably; finding myself worse off than before.
I need to return to my Father, but what will He say? Will He receive me back after all I have done?
I could see He might receive me back if this was the first time but my second, third, fourth? How many times will I test His patience? Why have I been fighting against Him?
“Ah Father, I'm so sorry. I have been such a fool.”
Will He accept my plea? Will He turn away from me?
I have nothing left to lose, but to ask, as this shame is more than I can bear.
“Father I'm coming home. I pray You will receive me. I'm walking back Father to the place where I left You. I am scared You won't receive me. Have I gone too far this time?”
I'm on my knees now as the shame and guilt are weighing heavily upon me. I cannot take another step as I'm not deserving of His love.
Maybe if I reached out with an outstretched hand I could just touch His feet. I know I cannot look Him in the face as I have let him down again and again. I have disgraced Him. How can He ever look at me again?
I am face down in the dirt with my outstretched hand praying to just touch His feet, though I am so unworthy even to touch His sandals.
“Father forgive me. I am so sorry, will You forgive me? Can You?”
The sorrow is so great I feel as though my heart will burst from the pain.
“Wait... what is this that I am feeling? Father is that You? Is it really Your presence that I am feeling? Father, no, please do not ask me to look up at You. I am so not worthy. The shame is too great. Father, please can't I just lay prostrate at Your feet?”
“My child NO! Please do not fight me, but feel the love I have for you. Receive it like you never have before. Look, not only up at me, but rise! Your sins are forgiven. I hold no condemnation over you. I love you My child, the shame and guilt are more than you are to carry. Lay them down.”
“Hold fast to me and keep your eyes upon me, feel My love for you and sin no more.”
Welcome Home My child, you have been missed.
John 8:7b-12 (NKJV)
7 and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.” 8 And again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. 9 Then those who heard it, being convicted by their conscience,[b] went out one by one, beginning with the oldest even to the last. And Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. 10 When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her,[c] “Woman, where are those accusers of yours?[d] Has no one condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said to her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and[e] sin no more.” 12 Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”
Romans 8:1 (NKJV)
1 There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus,[a] who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Love is a choice freely given
Before becoming saved we believe we need to work for ones salvation. We tend to also believe we need to earn ones love. Gods word states too love. We can never do enough to earn HIS love and yet HE freely gives it to us. That is what we should also do. Offer love without making others have to prove they deserve it.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
The Teenager In Us
Have you ever noticed how much we are like the teenager, parent relationship with God? There comes a time in most teenagers life where they want nothing to do with their parent unless they need something or are in trouble. The come to the parents with a need and if the parent does not comply to their teenagers request than they storm off, ignoring the parents. They then might go and find another way to get what they want that might lead into trouble. They want what they want and now. They do not always understand the parents reasoning for saying no. The parents than may not see or hear from their child again until another need arises or they are in trouble.
Is this not how we are with God at times? How many times have we gone to God with a request? We don't acknowledge God for who He is in our lives and what He has done. We don't offer up thanksgiving or praise to Him. We just expect Him to comply when we say Bless me Father give me what I am wanting. And just like a teenager when we are told no we get angry at God. We too can tend to storm off and try to doing it ourselves and in our own way.
Like parents, we would love for our teenager to just sit down and talk to us. To share their day, concerns, fears and joys. TO sit and get to know us. God is the same way. He is wanting His children to just sit at His feet in His presence getting to know HIM!
When was the last time you went to God with out a request but to just sit in His presence offering up Praise for who HE is?
2 Timothy 3:1-4
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, (NASB)
Have you ever noticed how much we are like the teenager, parent relationship with God? There comes a time in most teenagers life where they want nothing to do with their parent unless they need something or are in trouble. The come to the parents with a need and if the parent does not comply to their teenagers request than they storm off, ignoring the parents. They then might go and find another way to get what they want that might lead into trouble. They want what they want and now. They do not always understand the parents reasoning for saying no. The parents than may not see or hear from their child again until another need arises or they are in trouble.
Is this not how we are with God at times? How many times have we gone to God with a request? We don't acknowledge God for who He is in our lives and what He has done. We don't offer up thanksgiving or praise to Him. We just expect Him to comply when we say Bless me Father give me what I am wanting. And just like a teenager when we are told no we get angry at God. We too can tend to storm off and try to doing it ourselves and in our own way.
Like parents, we would love for our teenager to just sit down and talk to us. To share their day, concerns, fears and joys. TO sit and get to know us. God is the same way. He is wanting His children to just sit at His feet in His presence getting to know HIM!
When was the last time you went to God with out a request but to just sit in His presence offering up Praise for who HE is?
2 Timothy 3:1-4
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, (NASB)
Be Blessed
Friday, September 25, 2009
Getting Dressed for the Day!
When we get up in the morning we decide what we will wear for the day. In Colossians 3:12 it states: So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience: (NASB)
What if we visualized putting on the heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patiences as though they were articles of clothing?
When we get up each day invision ourselves putting on our clothes as though each article of clothing were one of those acts. Helping us to know how to treat those we may come into contact with. Rather we get along with them or not.
First put on the t-shirt of compassion as it covers our heart that guides our feelings
Second put on a shirt as we put one arm into the sleeve of gentleness and the other arm in the sleeve or kindness; as it is with our arms that we reach out to help others.
Third put on the pants of patience as we kneel in prayer for others and or our self as we wait.
Finally putting on the shoes of humility as we try to walk in the other persons shoes.
Once we have dressed for how we are to treat others, we can then put on the clothes to help us for what may come against us.
Ephesians 6:11-17 11Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.
12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
13Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm.
14Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS,
15and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE;
16in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
17And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
By doing this each day we have prepared ourselves for whatever lies ahead of us. In how to treat others and how to stand against adversity.
Be Blessed
What if we visualized putting on the heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patiences as though they were articles of clothing?
When we get up each day invision ourselves putting on our clothes as though each article of clothing were one of those acts. Helping us to know how to treat those we may come into contact with. Rather we get along with them or not.
First put on the t-shirt of compassion as it covers our heart that guides our feelings
Second put on a shirt as we put one arm into the sleeve of gentleness and the other arm in the sleeve or kindness; as it is with our arms that we reach out to help others.
Third put on the pants of patience as we kneel in prayer for others and or our self as we wait.
Finally putting on the shoes of humility as we try to walk in the other persons shoes.
Once we have dressed for how we are to treat others, we can then put on the clothes to help us for what may come against us.
Ephesians 6:11-17 11Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.
12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
13Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm.
14Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS,
15and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE;
16in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
17And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
By doing this each day we have prepared ourselves for whatever lies ahead of us. In how to treat others and how to stand against adversity.
Be Blessed
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